Survivor show some……

Survivor show her/hi strength gotten from their painful experiences.
Survivor find her/his selfesteem, thanks for  her/his family, friends or others who actually have supported them.
Some survivor did not noticed but unfortunately notice through such process of recovery.

This is really what perpetrator want to learn in their bottom of heart, unconscious area or spiritual area.
Perpetrator is the past victim not survivor and has to learn how to be survivor from their victim.
Perpetrator transforms her/his stress, hurt of heart and some PTSD element against victim.
Perpetrator need victim because she/he dislike to admit their weakness and poverty of heart.
Or just as phenomena of PTSD, perpetrator relive her/his traumatic experience which she/he had gotten before or past.

Famous story of vicarious experience of PTSD is the murder who used to be a American solider in the Vietnam war.
He had continue to kill someone on every same day in a year.
Finally psychologist found his PTSD which he got at the battlefield.
His friend was killed by bomb just in front of him at the day.
He had realized his experiences every year through killing someone.
You may feel strange — Why did he kill people in spite of he might have sadness through losing his friend?
That is the internalized hurt of him and the hurt acts to be found by someone.
The deep hurt continue to act until it would be recognized by it’s owner.
For example, some bullied person would bully someone later.
What kind of person are they?
They are the people who have denied his sad experience or been under impression that they don’t feel anything with their delusional reason that they are strong or the incident is not so important for them.
They ignore their emotion because it is so scare to feel such a terrible tragedy.
That is one of self-defense to keep their mental capacity.
Some people who face some terrible incident – bully, assault, accident, disease –  choose way to ignore, deny, think it easy depending on their resilience capacity.
Resilience capacity is developed by love of their family, friends and others.
So people assaulted by parents tend to lose their resilience.
Ignored hurt become ice in heart and it cause violence mentally and physically.
Then people who has such an ice would attack other people like their perpetrator of themselves.
It is message from ice – “please find me” “please melt me with your love”.
That’s why counseling and healing are important for perpetrator to prevent next criminal.
Perpetrator really need love not punishment.
Punishment itself may work as assault on such hurt and injured people.
If their hurt and injured heart could have been found by someone in earlier term and healed by somehow, it would not become ice and be melted by love.
The best way to prevent criminal is to find injured heart and heal it in earlier term.

You can see typical earlier term of healing in the victim of incident.
Victim shows scare, sadness panic and later anger so emotionally.
Perpetrator needed such a emotional feeling in earlier term of their tragedy.
Victim sometimes shows memory impairment and memory loss.
This is same as self-defense to keep their mental capacity.
Perpetrator could learn how people are depressed and how they will recover.
Spiritually or unconsciously perpetrator grab victim who may show similar topic with them.

On the other perspective point, perpetrator grab victim which has similar needs as him/her.
This is the next topic.

Ray – with Phoolan

































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July 2019
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Sky Salon
Salon at the 21st floor where you can see view of Osaka city.